A Pirate's Life for Me
Part 7

Posted by Trevor on March 16, 2009

Tags: Disneyland, Jerry, Mr. Smee, Peter Pan unit

I caught up with them halfway down the service road. They were both very quiet as we approached the break area. We were all thinking the same thing. What if someone in Attractions radioed "Entertainment 1" and they radioed "Character 1" and then they sent someone to check? We still hadn't taken our heads off when Jerry popped out from behind a dumpster with two security guards dressed as keystone cops. They sauntered up to us.

"Well boys, is there anything you feel you ought to be telling me?" Jerry smirked.

"Uh...happy Independence Day, Jerry?" Jake offered.

Jerry twitched. "You wouldn't happen to know anything about some people under a waterfall would you?"

"No," said Jake.

"No," said Danny.

"Um...no," said me.

"Fine. Keep your heads on and come with me," Jerry ordered.

They marched us in a line through the park up to America Sings. Then they separated us out. We didn't even have time to get our story straight.

In the office, Jerry lectured, "Now there's the right way and the wrong way, and then there's the Disney way. We've got rules for a reason. We know the three of you weren't where you were supposed to be. Now write down what actually happened in your own words."

Well, that's what really happened. What I wrote on the report was: "I was just following Peter."

It was my first offense. I hoped they would go easy on me. They collected our forms.

"Well boys," said Jerry, "you haven't given us much to go on. You're all suspended for three days pending an investigation. We'll call you and let you know if you get to keep your jobs."

They marched us down to the Head Room where we they took our heads and our costumes. Then they marched us down to the Zoo Crew locker room, and Jerry stood over us as we cleaned out our lockers. Danny knew the routine. He'd been suspended three times and was prepared with a duffel bag for his personal belongings. Jake had been suspended a total of seven times and had taken to not leaving things in his locker for just this reason. I handed in my T-shirt, shorts, and socks. They escorted us up to Harbor House Employee Exit and took our nametags and I.D.s . As I stood there in the employee parking lot and the monorail passed overhead, I felt sick.

"I got to hand it to you rookie. I thought you were gonna talk," said Jake.

"Don't worry about it," Danny said. "It's the busiest time of the year. What are they gonna do, fire us? We're goin' back in the park. You wanna come? No? Suit yourself. Oh, here, you earned it."

He handed me the snapshot of the three of us in the boat with the simulated Bayou backdrop. Then Danny and Jake went back into the park to watch the fireworks. I went back to my shitty motel room in East Anaheim where I was living and waited for the phone call. That night as Tinker Bell took flight, sliding down a wire strung between the top of the Matterhorn and a tower on a back service road in Frontierland and the "Fantasy in the Sky" fireworks were going on and the shockwaves were setting off car alarms and annoying the crack-house pit bulls next door, I thought, "God I hope they don't fire me. I love Disneyland!"

It's three days later and they still haven't called. I haven't been outside once. Then the phone rings.

"Hello, yes this is Alan. Yes, I understand, but I promise I'll never do it again--what? Five, five and a half, why? Hotel Breakfast Pluto 6:30 tomorrow morning? Of course I'll be there!"

After all, the face character auditions were coming up. I had learned my lesson: Have fun, but just don't get caught.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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